
WARNING: Royal buzz-kill ahead
I love weddings. The April 29th nuptials of Prince William and Catherine Middleton are no exception. It’s a real-life fairytale playing out in living color right before our eyes. It’s the age-old tale of commoner-girl meets a boy who happens to be a prince. Friendship grows into romance; romance blossoms into happily ever after. Sounds like the stuff of romance novels, doesn’t it?
As does the fact that Kate Middleton is the first non-aristocrat to marry into the British royal family in 350 years. Some reports have even gone so far as to say she may actually “save” the royal family. Whatever that means…
I’d venture a guess that most romance readers and writers – myself included – are captivated by the wildly romantic notion of a commoner becoming a princess. And why not? The girl gets her prince; she could become queen; to-die-for jewelry is part of the uniform; and she gets the perfect wedding – the kind most of us only dream of. In fact, there’s been much ado about the details of this storybook day: her dress, the flowers, the cake, the wedding route, carriage or Rolls Royce… or both, the guest list – from which our own President Obama has apparently been omitted. However, from what I’ve read, this wasn’t a royal snub. It was simply because security to protect him and the first lady is too expensive. To make it up to him, President and Mrs. O and their two daughters are invited to visit the Queen in late May and spend three days as her guests at Buckingham Palace. Not a bad conciliation prize, huh?
Yeah – Slam on breaks here. State visit or not, reading about security issues was the pin that popped my royal bubble. After that, I happened across legions of articles that offered a reality-check (or buzz-kill, if you will) about what the life of a modern princess actually entails.
In addition to throngs of ever-present security teams (so much for secretly
slipping out to the Twisty-Treat to satisfy that ice cream craving), there’s a lot of pressure on Kate and William to get right what Charles and Diana did so disastrously wrong. Kate and William are off to a good start since they seem to be genuinely in love. However, the demands were evident when William placed Diana’s famous sapphire engagement ring on his bride-to-be’s finger. I don’t know… wouldn’t that feel like an awfully heavy weight to lug around? Seems like it would be a constant reminder of the tragedy that befell Diana. Perhaps ghosts are part of the royal package?
Like Diana, Kate and William will sacrifice their right to privacy. They will pledge allegiance to the royal “family brand” first. Their life as a couple, and ultimately a family, will take a backseat. Kate, who was not raised in the public eye, must be “on” 24/7, presenting her most perfect self around the clock. Forget venturing out with sunglasses and a pony tail. It’s full makeup and coiffure from this day forward – and don’t forget the hat. Heaven forbid she chew gum in public or find herself overcome with an uncontrollable urge to laugh at an inappropriate moment, or let slip a dainty “hiccup” (because princesses do not suffer gas bubbles – that would be vulgar and much too common. The media would never forgive her).
Kate has quit her job with her parents’ party supply company to devote heart and soul to her new career as princess (and I must laud her platform on bully-prevention – she says she was bullied while in school and wants to put an end to others suffering the same humiliation). Speaking of bullies, perhaps she can use the awareness she will generate to influence her in-laws: one news article claimed Kate will likely never again enjoy Christmas lunch with her parents because in-laws are not invited to share holiday festivities at the palace. Hmm… if that’s true, and her anti-bullying stance doesn’t work, perhaps Wills and Kate, being the new “modern royals,” could affect change. Surely Queen Elizabeth could squeeze in two place settings for Mum and Dad Middleton.
Pondering this, my thoughts shift to what it would be like to never again
have Christmas dinner with my daughter. Since I’m married, I can’t help but wonder what if my daughter met and fell in love with a prince? Sure, it’s far-fetched, but it could happen. Kate has paved the way, and Harry is still eligible. Would I wish this life on my daughter? It sure seems the Middletons might have mixed feelings. On one hand, since Kate will likely one day become the Queen of England, their little girl will become an important thread in the tapestry of British history. That’s huge. She’ll take her place next to Victoria and Elizabeth and… Anne Boleyn. We all know what happened to poor Anne Boleyn, whose only crimes were ambition and falling head-over-heels for her beloved Henry. Okay, time for another royal reality-check … Obviously Anne Boleyn’s crimes were debatable, and, at best, she wasn’t exactly the innocent bystander.
No disrespect to Catherine Middleton, because she seems the picture of poise and perfectly cut out for the job, but I wouldn’t want the life for which she is
signing on. Nor would I wish it on my daughter – not for the crown jewels of England. I prefer to live out my princess dreams on the pages of my novels.
Will I watch the royal nuptials? You bet I will. I’ll put on my blinders and block out the realities of what it really means to trade one’s commoner card for life on the throne. I’ll sigh over Kate’s beauty and the love that will be surely be apparent in William’s eyes. I hope he cries when he sees her. I love it when the groom is so overcome with love it moves him to tears. See, I’m already getting swept away…
How about you? Would you want to be a princess? Will you watch the royal wedding? Do you like stories about aristocrats falling in love with commoners? I’ll give away a copy of my book, “Accidental Princess,” to one person who posts about anything royal. Or if you already have that book, just let me know and I’ll send you something else.
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