Comments on: All Things Equal http://jauntyquills.com/2008/12/06/all-things-equal/ Wed, 23 May 2012 00:56:51 +0000 hourly 1 http://wordpress.org/?v=3.3.2 By: Shana http://jauntyquills.com/2008/12/06/all-things-equal/comment-page-1/#comment-137073 Shana Sun, 07 Dec 2008 19:10:32 +0000 http://jauntyquills.com/2008/12/06/all-things-equal/#comment-137073 No, things don't have to be equal. Some years my sister has received more than I have. We have different needs at different times. Now I receive less because my parents were very up front that after my husband and I married, they were taking the money they spent on both of us separately and combining it. That's okay. I have a husband to buy for me, too, and my sister doesn't. It's all about the thought, not the amount. No, things don’t have to be equal. Some years my sister has received more than I have. We have different needs at different times. Now I receive less because my parents were very up front that after my husband and I married, they were taking the money they spent on both of us separately and combining it. That’s okay. I have a husband to buy for me, too, and my sister doesn’t. It’s all about the thought, not the amount.

]]> By: Quilt Lady http://jauntyquills.com/2008/12/06/all-things-equal/comment-page-1/#comment-137045 Quilt Lady Sun, 07 Dec 2008 18:13:03 +0000 http://jauntyquills.com/2008/12/06/all-things-equal/#comment-137045 I try to keep thing equal as much as possible. My sister does also with her daughters and son in laws. I think she has had to cut back some on how much though. I try to keep thing equal as much as possible. My sister does also with her daughters and son in laws. I think she has had to cut back some on how much though.

]]> By: Laura http://jauntyquills.com/2008/12/06/all-things-equal/comment-page-1/#comment-136854 Laura Sun, 07 Dec 2008 12:58:24 +0000 http://jauntyquills.com/2008/12/06/all-things-equal/#comment-136854 You've just identified one of the reasons I don't exchange gifts anymore (and haven't for about 17 years now). There's too much pressure on that sort of thing. It feels like an obligation and creates stress. My thing is, if you're not doing it because you genuinely want to and you're not getting them something you want them to have (and I would assume you know they want), you shouldn't be doing it. I prefer to buy things throughout the year for people I care about - because I want to, not because a date on the calendar pressures me into doing it. I know that probably makes me sound like a "bah humbug" Scrooge but really I'm not. I just don't feel like anyone should feel obligated to give something to anyone - regardless of who they are in their life - and if they do when they feel that way, well, ask yourself, how would you feel if someone was giving you a present - not because they wanted to but because they felt obligated to? It doesn't mean as much. Sorry if what I've said offends anyone, it's not my intent. This is just one of the things that frustrates me about the holidays. You’ve just identified one of the reasons I don’t exchange gifts anymore (and haven’t for about 17 years now). There’s too much pressure on that sort of thing. It feels like an obligation and creates stress. My thing is, if you’re not doing it because you genuinely want to and you’re not getting them something you want them to have (and I would assume you know they want), you shouldn’t be doing it. I prefer to buy things throughout the year for people I care about – because I want to, not because a date on the calendar pressures me into doing it.

I know that probably makes me sound like a “bah humbug” Scrooge but really I’m not. I just don’t feel like anyone should feel obligated to give something to anyone – regardless of who they are in their life – and if they do when they feel that way, well, ask yourself, how would you feel if someone was giving you a present – not because they wanted to but because they felt obligated to? It doesn’t mean as much.

Sorry if what I’ve said offends anyone, it’s not my intent. This is just one of the things that frustrates me about the holidays.

]]> By: Fedora http://jauntyquills.com/2008/12/06/all-things-equal/comment-page-1/#comment-136446 Fedora Sun, 07 Dec 2008 00:59:15 +0000 http://jauntyquills.com/2008/12/06/all-things-equal/#comment-136446 I'd say that as much as you can, yes, but the bottom line is that it isn't always a dollar amount as long as you've put the heart/effort into getting something thoughtful for each of them. And sometimes it's just easier to think of things for people you know better, so maybe it'll get easier and easier to find "equal" things as time goes on... I’d say that as much as you can, yes, but the bottom line is that it isn’t always a dollar amount as long as you’ve put the heart/effort into getting something thoughtful for each of them. And sometimes it’s just easier to think of things for people you know better, so maybe it’ll get easier and easier to find “equal” things as time goes on…

]]> By: Kristan Higgins http://jauntyquills.com/2008/12/06/all-things-equal/comment-page-1/#comment-136418 Kristan Higgins Sat, 06 Dec 2008 23:01:24 +0000 http://jauntyquills.com/2008/12/06/all-things-equal/#comment-136418 I think you're right, Cindy. Granted, my kids are a long way from being married, but given that I've already picked out their spouses, I know I'm going to love my daughter- and son-in-law! So yes, I'd do the equal thing, too. I think you’re right, Cindy. Granted, my kids are a long way from being married, but given that I’ve already picked out their spouses, I know I’m going to love my daughter- and son-in-law! So yes, I’d do the equal thing, too.

]]> By: RobynDeHart http://jauntyquills.com/2008/12/06/all-things-equal/comment-page-1/#comment-136257 RobynDeHart Sat, 06 Dec 2008 16:22:44 +0000 http://jauntyquills.com/2008/12/06/all-things-equal/#comment-136257 I don't do the equal thing. I always get more for my sister and mom than I do the rest of the adults in my family - except for the Professor. And I've never done the equal thing when it comes to the kiddos in our family. I get them things that I know they'll like, but if I spend $10 more on this one than I do on that one, it doesn't matter. It's not a race as far as I'm concerned. I think number of presents matters in equality, but the monetary number should be contingent on what the person likes. I don’t do the equal thing. I always get more for my sister and mom than I do the rest of the adults in my family – except for the Professor. And I’ve never done the equal thing when it comes to the kiddos in our family. I get them things that I know they’ll like, but if I spend $10 more on this one than I do on that one, it doesn’t matter. It’s not a race as far as I’m concerned. I think number of presents matters in equality, but the monetary number should be contingent on what the person likes.

]]> By: Emily McKay http://jauntyquills.com/2008/12/06/all-things-equal/comment-page-1/#comment-136236 Emily McKay Sat, 06 Dec 2008 15:28:51 +0000 http://jauntyquills.com/2008/12/06/all-things-equal/#comment-136236 I think so. But ironically, even though I believe that (and certainly enjoy getting equal presents from my inlaws), I know I spend less on my brother-in-law than I do on my sister. But partly it's because he'll never say what he wants and I just don't know him as well. So that Starbucks gift card that I know he'll love would have to get pretty big before it'd match whatever I'm buying my sister. I think so. But ironically, even though I believe that (and certainly enjoy getting equal presents from my inlaws), I know I spend less on my brother-in-law than I do on my sister. But partly it’s because he’ll never say what he wants and I just don’t know him as well. So that Starbucks gift card that I know he’ll love would have to get pretty big before it’d match whatever I’m buying my sister.

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