December 22, 2005
The Joys of Wrapping
Written by Kimberly Logan in Jaunty PostWell, it’s that time of year again, ladies and gents. The time that all procrastinators such as I look forward to with relish and eager anticipation. (And yes, you DO hear a touch of sarcasm in that statement, folks!) That’s right. It’s time for the annual last minute wrapping of the gifts. Time to eye the huge mound of presents you have purchased for every single person you know and wonder why you didn’t decide to just get them all gift cards.
Sigh. Yes, I know I sound like a Scrooge, but I do this to myself every year. Somehow, I always wind up waiting until the last minute and then I have to rush to get all my wrapping done on Christmas Eve. This year I have no excuses. I’m between books and have the extra time, but I have spent that extra time doing things like feeding my sad soap opera addiction. (See last Thursday’s blog for the details on that.) I swear, I meant to do things differently this Christmas. I promised myself that I would sit down last night and do it, but somehow I couldn’t quite bring myself to follow through. There were too many other things that I far preferred doing. Like ramming bamboo shoots under my fingernails, for instance…
It would be one thing if I halfway enjoyed this chore or was even any good at it. But sadly, I inherited NONE of my parents’ genes when it comes to wrapping. (IS there a wrapping gene?) My father is very artsy and makes a huge production out of wrapping his gifts every year. He gets very creative, coming up with new ways to fashion ribbons and bows that are astonishing. My mother isn’t as elaborate as my dad, but she is very neat and precise. All of her presents are wrapped just so, with perfectly folded corners and not a lump or bump to be seen. It’s mind-boggling for someone like me, who has problems just getting the paper off the roll.
There must be a secret to all of this, but if there is, I haven’t been able to discover it. If there were classes in Giftwrapping 101, I should probably be first in line to take them. For not only am I a procrastinator, but I stink at wrapping. It is a running joke at Christmas time that you can always tell which gifts under the tree are from me, even without looking at the tags. I wouldn’t know a perfectly folded corner if it bit me. There are bumps and lumps galore and so much tape that they look as if they have been mummified. Even my niece and nephews are starting to eye me with pity.
Oh, well. I suppose we can’t all be expert wrappers. I always tell everyone that they are only going to tear the paper off anyway. It’s what’s inside that counts. But now, I suppose it’s time for me to get back to coming up with ways to avoid…er, I mean I need to get back to wrapping. 
A very Merry Christmas to you all!
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Isabel Says:
The only present I wrap is the DH’s. I cannot wrap presents for the life of me. Instead I buy really cute gift bags and tissue. Voila! Merry Christmas. Why torture my friends and relatives with my hideous attempts at wrapping gifts? Now the DH, is sort of like your Mom. He is neat and precise to borrow your words Kim. Although this year he spent some money getting gifts wrapped.
Shirley Karr Says:
Here’s another thing we have in common, Kim! The last-minute, late-night-on-Christmas-Eve part, anyway. I just *love* how popular gift bags have become. Like Isabel said, take tissue paper and a bag, and ta-dah! Makes life much simpler.
My big thing used to be disguising the gifts. I’ll never forget the Christmas I had just turned 18, and had my first paying job. I’d bought my mom a Black Hills gold ring and had her wedding diamond re-set in it (the marriage was long over, but the stone had been cut by her dad). First I gave her the ring box with her stone-less wedding ring (she didn’t even know it had been missing from her jewelry box) which gave her a mild panic attack. “What did you do?!?” she kept saying. The new ring was wrapped like Russian nesting dolls, one box inside another box until the last one was big enough to hold a Big Wheel.
She loves to tell the story of that ring. She got a big kick out of the fact I had to get a family friend to sign for me when I put the ring on layaway, since I was still a minor at the time. (And she was even more amazed the friend was able to keep the secret.
Nowadays though I couldn’t do that, wrap over and over; it would seem like such a waste of paper. Is that a sign of advancing age — becoming too practical?
Isabel Says:
I will say becoming Shirley. To me all the gift wrap seems like a waste of paper too. I use the gift bags I get as lunch bags through out the year. That way I don’t have to throw them away and feel guilty about it. A co-worker gave me a gift with the cutest gift bag and she told that she didn’t put my name on the bag that way I could re-use it if I’d wanted to. Yes, I think we’re practical women LOL.
Isabel Says:
On the first sentence I meant to say…
“I will say we’re becoming practical, Shirley.”
*Isabel blushing furiously*
Anne Mallory Says:
I am one of those weirdo people who gets artsy with magazine pages forged into paper, individualized tags, personalized ornamentation, blah, blah, blah — but, only on single gifts. Takes way too much energy otherwise.
When it gets to Christmas with multiple gifts and family members asking for wrap jobs, things can get rather rushed and botched and overlapped. Christmas is all about the unwrapping to me, so I don’t get to paranoid about my wrap jobs. If everything is covered, it’s good to go.